intersections...

5.18:
tick tock tick...
blue square, white square, blue square, white,
blue, white, brick.
shadows to the left, shadows to the right...
i look up and see a 4-year old wobbling along, blond hair flying...one hand holding her mother's index finger tightly and the free one making patterns in the air...and i can't help but smile...that seems to throw her off a bit...she wobbles some more, dangerously to one side until her mother steadies her...and then she grins back! :) yay! and then they walk past...
back to counting bricks...what's that tune in my head?...brick, white, brick, white, brick...black?
i look up this time to see an unfamiliar face, new to the 5.28er's scene...hmm...
blast!!!! screech and hiss!!!!...drat that train!...well at least it's on time...
brick, white, brick, brick, gate...the cherry blossoms have gone...the trees look lovely still...about turn.
ah! 'take me the way i am...' :) how wonderful it is to remember that melody drifting about elusively in your head and pin it to the words that went with it...
bells and whistles...
more screeches and hisses...
there comes the northbound...have a nice evening ya'll...
brick, brick, brick, yellow...and up...
her eyes look steady but she seems to be staring at something far far away...what a lovely embroidered jacket....it must be from india....she turns momentarily, startling me from my half-reverie, half question and we both avert our gazes quickly...it's the song's fault, else i wouldn't have walked staring and grinning...brick, white, blue, blue, blue...ah! the breeze....
there comes K....
running back from Safeway...as she does everyday...
getting a thrill out of making a dash for the stores in her 12-minute wait...watching her huff and puff and then break out in a victorious grin with her thumbs up at me makes me smile again...and i smilingly turn and this time her eyes bore into my face, intense at first and then relaxing to an open, curious and yet somewhat tentative look! i do understand what that little girl felt like now...my smile just widened and directed itself straight at her...
blast!!!! drat...how come it always always gives me a jolt, the silly train!...and just before i turn to walk back a few paces to get my usual coach, she smiles back, with relief, glad to have not been the one to grin (stupidly?) first, a hint of dismay? for the conversation that almost began...
5.55:
finally...cal ave!...i like the blue blue of the fountain...like i like it everyday...the froth and the bubbles, the little ripples that are in constant formation...the hills in the distance...i heave a sigh of satisfaction...doggyyy!!!...wait..let me cross over to the other side...me in peace and you with more wag room...
what a lovely embroidered jacket...wait!! it's the same lady...so she gets off here eh...how funny our paths should cross again... just as she turned to look my way before crossing herself, i had started to walk again...
there's a sale at k&s...wonder what cameras they have on....and by the time i pick up my brisk pace and look around...she's gone and with it the conversation...another time then! another day...
...
5.59:
a little late...
it doesn't matter, cal ave. at last...there's my blue fountain...and the hills in the distance...what a day it has been...two ladies, probably in their late 50s walk by, one talking animatedly and the other nodding vigorously..."it's just that feeling, you know?"... :) yes, i know....i see the flickering man on the traffic lights...but i don't feel like hurrying...not today...i will wait for the next one...apparently the fellow walking in beat to the music in his headphones felt the same way...and we smile...yes, it's not worth it...there's music to be heard and the walk savored...what's that tune?...hmm...it will come to me...the car to my left inches out slowly, creeping out in front of us, lest we decide to walk first?...oh! don't worry, there's music to be heard and the walk unhurried...crossing the road i think..there comes the rotten broccoli junction...an ungodly stench, why won't they do something about it?...but the roses ahead are lovely...freakishly large, but lovely all the same...all these leaves on the street...they will be red soon in fall....shadows of a jogger...ah! it's from 'rhythm'...what imagery the lyrics have...shaking my head at its beauty i look up...and stare right into the face of the jogger...and a smile breaks out! i know this face...have our paths crossed before? i frowned a little in confusion, smiling still...and she smiles back broadly :) yay! why it's the lady of the embroidered jacket!..well, you have a good evening dear...now where did i leave that song?....suddenly her footsteps stop and she turns around "we've met", she says...there is no one else on the road...it must be me...i turn around....and smile again, yes, we have..."at the train station?"..."yes! that's right"....and so begins the conversation...she lived here on college terrace...a wonderful location...i most decidedly agree...they've moved now, not far, but not on c.t.,...they would love to move back..."we wanted to stay close to..."...oh? i wonder...of course it makes sense to me...but why to her...her son needs the therapy...no! why children? my heart goes out to you, it does..."but he's much better now" she says....thank god! :)....now that her family is away briefly she can catch up on her jogging!...what fun! :)..."yes, that must be nice in a way", i comment...hmm...gosh! i could just jog if i so pleased...it must be a stolen pleasure for her, the poor dear...a wonderful melody..."...many children do you have?"...da di dum....what?!...there must be an appropriate response to this...the last time i was asked for my id at a table that was being served with drinks...i have never been asked this...i must've managed an intelligible response, because she smiled...we had been smiling the whole while...it's a most pleasant feeling, i must say....i must listen to that song tonight..." we must meet at the library!"....my eyes grow wide, did i miss more of that sentence again?!!..."yes, that would be lovely, i go there often"...she smiles...apparently not..."yes, it would be nice to meet again"..."yes, it will be P"....and we went on our ways...
:)...
what a smile can do...of strangers friends make....

At the Farmer's market

Some snatches of conversation overheard...

'Why! This is like a festival!...'
'...Ah!...The good life!'
'Ooohh!! Look at the colors!'
'Mommy, these are the sweetest plouts, ever! You have to get them!
'Did you make these yourself? They are so beautiful...'
'...Ave. is transformed every Sunday....All these people, all the sounds...'
'... hand-picked and bottled...they stay fresh for weeks...'
'...a little sunshine, a little water and all your love; that's all they need.'
'A cup of coffee, Miss? Freshly brewed...'
'...and you have a gorgeous day!'...

And you too! :)

Makes my heart sing with joy, it does! Sing Hallelujah for farmer's markets!

This week. A busy week. A good week.

This week has been a furious week of activity at work and outside. And a good many events occurred and topics emerged that I have wanted to think aloud and write about , but haven't had the time to dwell on at length. So, I resorted to posting links about a few of them as a compromise. But that won't do...It isn't quite right...But not to fret! The weekend is upon me and write I shall! See you soon blogger! :)

enc-roche-ment

The Roche-Genentech merger: The ultimate union of diagnostics and therapeutics?

An interesting read on vengeance in the Week of Forgiveness and Mercy.

For the geek in you!

The science behind the Diet Coke and Mentos Reaction

...because you know you love it!

Should I want something because it is supposed to make me happy? Or should I want something because it actually does make me happy? Should I even use the word 'should'? Perhaps it ought to just be, I want something...More cobwebs in the attic!

In Remembrance

Remembering Prof. Randy Pausch and his last lecture. May his soul rest in peace.

Father I place into your hands...

A children's hymn I learnt in school and often hummed when worried or disturbed. I say this as a prayer today, for my friend.

Father, I place into Your hands
The things I cannot do.
Father, I place into Your hands
The things that I’ve been through.
Father, I place into Your hands
The way that I should go,
For I know I always can trust You.

Father, I place into Your hands
My friends and family.
Father, I place into Your hands
The things that trouble me.
Father, I place into Your hands
The person I would be,
For I know I always can trust You.

Father, we love to see Your face,
We love to hear Your voice.
Father, we love to sing Your praise
And in Your name rejoice.
Father, we love to walk with You
And in Your presence rest,
For we know we always can trust You.

Father, I want to be with You
And do the things You do.
Father, I want to speak the words
That You are speaking too.
Father, I want to love the ones
That You will draw to You,
For I know that I am one with You.

Father, I place into your hands my friends, and their friends, their disappointments and doubts, their sorrows and their tears, their sufferings and their miseries.
Father I seek your grace and mercy upon these friends, your healing touch upon their fevered brows, so you may lay to rest their fears, and ease away their worries.
For I know I always can trust you.

Courage and acceptance

Here's a thought for this week:

"Lord grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change, the courage to change the things I can, and the wisdom to know the difference." - Saint Francis of Assisi

A prayer so simple, and yet contained in it is a message of such humility and surrender to the Lord above. Indeed, it is only He who can grant us the wisdom, courage and forbearance we need, and only He can deliver us from all trials, strengthening our convictions, renewing our faith and our very spirits.
This Saint of Assisi has been a source of inspiration to me through my years in school and continues to be to this day...

I want nothing more than to sink my toes into the sand in a beach somewhere and nod off with a book over my eyes, with a gentle breeze blowing over...
You can tell, I can't wait for this weekend to begin...

Zucchini... what an inherently funny sounding word!!!...if i had not known that it was a vegetable, i wouldn't have guessed it was! Oh! what delightful sounding words swirl around me...

Having said that...I'm about at the end of my tether there!...how about some miracles shower down right now and make my experiments work?? One will do nicely, thank you :)
Still doing 'well' :).

How are you today?

How do you answer this question? Well, you could be totally English about it and insist "I am well, and you?" (Or, you really could be, and I am incredibly happy for you that that is the case :) )Or, you could launch into a detailed description of how you twisted your ankle two weeks ago and how the occasional mis-step causes you great discomfort.
But really, are you well? -In the former case. In the latter, it is clear you aren't, and the discomfort itself becomes communicable in a way.
Coming back to those who are well, now, when you say you are 'well', do you mean you are in the pink of blooming health or do I take it to mean you are feeling rather jolly today? Hmm...
As for those who aren't, here's what I wish- I wish that the question always prompted an introspection of one's state of mind. Specifically an effort to separate the effect of a long, tiring day from the cheerful disposition that might be buried underneath. (I am convinced it is, it is a matter of digging deep to unearth it. Or digging enough to plant it, if not!) Happiness is a state of mind after all. So I guess I am wishing everyone were truly happy, deep within, despite everythig life throws at them day after day.
That is not to say, one could never get bogged down by worry, disappointment, or sheer fatigue. Nor is it to say that one should never confide those feelings to a dear one. But the very act of believing that happiness is internal and can be readily tapped into at such moments, must make the load lighter to bear, eh? And what a wonderful vector that would be to infect others with!
So go on and be merry my dears!
ps: I am doing very well today, thank you :)

Thought for the day...

A tradition we followed all through school. Every morning, we would turn to a new page in our little school diary, where at the bottom would be inscribed an inspiring quote to live by, a kindly virtue to adopt, or a line of prayer given in thanks for the bounties we have. The same would be written across the blackboard in our classrooms for us to be reminded of every time we looked up at it. At the time I did not realize it, but it must have seeped in little by little- the beauty of having a 'thought for the day'. After all, it is very easy to lead life, day after day, without spending much time thinking about our actions, how they affect us, those around us and the world at large; easier still to skirt around the fact that this life has been gifted to us to make an effort to rise up and reach a higher plane, a spiritual realm of truth, beauty, virtue, love, kindliness and justice. And every hour of every day, every thought and word, every act and gesture must lead us upwards and towards that realm. Not an easy peak to scale, and a rocky and arduous slope to climb, that we need every aid and support we can get. And this 'thought for the day' is that handle; words of wisdom that many a benevolent and generous soul have left behind as sign posts in a trail, so we may tread this path without losing our way, so we may rise to our calling without slipping, and find the light and peace eternal...


So, here's a thought for today:
'Praise loudly, blame softly'- Catherine the Great.


And I shall try to post a new one every day, or week at least. Harder still will be to live those words and find the truth in them, but endeavor I must. So join me as I seek to do so.

I love it here! ---shivers--- I miss home.

At long last...

At long last the day has arrived...the day I have waited for, for the last 7 odd years...it feels exactly like what I had dreamt for myself...a wonderful rush of exuberance, liberation sublime, a lazy summer day and an evening to kill...the day has arrived!la di da!~...glory be to God! la di da!~...I have a whole weekend and a delightful book to read! What's better, that's exactly how the week that follows it and the weekend after, and all the ones beyond it look! :) Oh joy!
It must not seem like a big deal to many. But allow me to describe why this is such a treat for me.

For years in school, I just had to begin the day with a book on my ride to school in the rickety school van. No matter that I had children of all ages eager to start another day chattering around me (and I joined in too), but I had a precious book in hand and a world within to retreat into at will and come back out for a change of scene. You see, it had to be read before the bell was rung for morning prayer. And then would come another book for recess, possibly the same to blot out dull lectures in organic chemistry, read ever more voraciously in the drugged silence that invariably resulted from hearing about the wonderful virtues of the carbon atom. And yet another one for the ride back home, to keep me company through lunch and bury my face into as Grandma's finger waved menacingly at me for the umpteenth time for not paying attention to food. A long story, a thick book, the smallest print it had to be... to recline with over my siesta and wake up to for the early evening and get a quick glimpse at before running for music lessons and run back to for dinner. And then came the minor matter of homework, to be quickly completed and put away, for what better way to fall asleep than over a tale masterfully crafted and cleverly wrapped up?

The end-quarter exam weeks were my favourite because that meant walking back home from school much earlier in the day, the day stretching out endlessly ahead, dear friends to muse with over all and sundry and a stop at my darling old Eshwari Lending Library on the way. A dimly-lit room filled with the smell of books, old and new, crisp and weathered, hardback and paper, hmmm...the feel of paper to skin, accompanied by the promise of a wondrous fantasy is the single most joyful thing ever imaginable. Ever. And a whole room full of it! (I shall have a library of my own one day. At home. With couches to sink into and lamps of wrought iron. A coffee maker in a corner somewhere. A window looking out at squirrels scampering up a tree...) At any rate, having 4 additional hours then meant a 4th book could be easily fit into a day's schedule. Perfect.

But then, sadly, school ended, and college began. (Not that I didn't like college, mind you. I loved it in fact.) And with it went my bus rides and stolen reads in class (the classes were facinating, yet a minor consolation, I assure you). More importantly, my vacant summer days of unquestioned freedom and abandon had been irrevovably snatched from me. Or seemingly so at least. It had to be filled with research breakthroughs. (In Biology that means sleeping and waking with the bug, mostly just waking.) And so, I promised myself, that one day, not far away, I shall reprise my summer of reading. It is wholly figurative, mind you. Come rain or hail, there will be reading for sure. I shall have merry rides on buses and trains, evenings to spare, weekends to sing and paint and hike about, but with hours to spare for the alphabet.

And so it was that yesterday a chance conversation with a friend while waiting for my bus (yay!) to work set the wheels in motion. He told me about the arrival of the hit Broadway musical, Wicked- The Untold Story of the Witches of Oz, in SFO and that sealed my resolve for the summer of '08. It brought back the irreristible urge to get my hands on a book , in this case, the one the musical is based on. With a singular determination, I headed straight for the bookstore after getting off the train (yay! again) in the evening. To my utter astonishment and great delight I found three copies of it sitting pretty on a shelf, in the fanstasy fiction section (rightly so).

As I flipped through the pages, it struck me that the day I'd promised myself had indeed arrived! I realized that I did have train and bus rides to take into work. I did not have quite the madness of my first two years at work trying to get on board as many projects as one humanly could, while giving standardized tests, training new hires, applying, PT, and ...the list goes on. It dawned on me that this summer is my summer. I have an art class and a web design class to go to, Dhwani to sing sweet melodies with, the perfect weather to go hiking about on, and evenings to myself. All to myself. Free from PT, free from guilt of a nobler cause turned into a series of deadening deadlines, free from panic of missing any (metaphorical) buses. It is just free. Free to read.

And this is how good it gets. Now I have a list of what I shall read and a few in hand already. A couple books to quickly finish tonight (burning the midnight oil is well worth the effort for such a cause) and my new book to begin!

Life is just peachy. Sing Hallelujah to the Lord!

ps: As an aside- It has been a week of Oz! It started Monday listening to Judy Garland reminiscing her days during the shooting of TWW of Oz, and the music of course. Oh! the sweet melody. It reached its highest point yesterday, and it wasn't over with Wicked. The bookstore owner let me in on a sneak preview of a cherished treasure- 100 years of Oz in print, capturing the book, to the film to all kinds of memorabilia photographed and documented...And while I'm at it, I figured I may as well watch TWW of Oz this weekend! Somewhere o'er the rainbow...:) Just peachy, I say.

Cavernous wonders

The weekend of the 4th my friends and I visited Lake Shasta and the Lassen National Park. A most vivacious group, crackling with wit and curiosity, warmth and good humor, made the weekend all the more memorable.
Day 1: Friday, the 4th
The cool morning air gave way to a toasty mid-morning by the time we reached the lake campgrounds. Parched expanses with sparse vegetation tinged yellow and brown stretched for miles around. Rings of variegated earthen colors baked out from where the water had evaporated encircled the lake. I thought to myself, what an unremarkable scenery...
We went about setting up our tents. One in particular proved our undoing. An irregular hexagon, if you will, was hoisted trying every combination of A-A and B-B, mostly getting A-C and B-A for the first 20 minutes. Finally, we got our geometry in order. Hurrah!
As I patted the dust off my hands and stood back to admire our handiwork, it struck me that here I was, a grown adult, about to 'live' in my tent-house! Okay, let me back up a bit. As a 5-year old my greatest desire was to own a tent-house. The kind my cousin had, and invited me over to have tea in every weekend, painted to look like a red brick structure, with yellow window panes and a little gray chimney. A make-believe world of our own, complete with a house, front and back yard; miniature cutlery, imagined friends, a battery-operated 'real' dog and time that stood still for us. Perfect. Almost. I would still go home and wish I had one of my own. Petty, I say. Yet.
And now, 20 years later, I stood outside yet another tent-'house', real friends, wilderness all round and a starry night that was sure to come and sighed with contentment.
At any rate, we made quick time to get on board the boat ride at the lake, to be followed by a quick bus ride to the Shasta caves. A full five minutes after we had entered the cool, dark interiors of the cavern, hundreds of thousand years in the making, I realized, that it was not the patchwork scenery or the lake itself that was to be the highlight of this day, but these mysterious caves.
A narrow path had been made for tourists, slippery in some places from the drops of water that fell intermittently. Stalactites in various stages of formation hung low. From thin and hollow-like, wafer thin 'straws' to waxy cones, to entire columns where stalactites and stalagmites met could be seen. As we made our way further interior and upwards, careful not to touch anything, lest the oils from our skin interrupted the calcite crystal formation, every turn of the corner brought an amazing new display; ceilings of broccoli, shallow craters or 'peanut brittle', clay icicles, ragged jaws and stony daggers.
Very low wattage lights, placed in nooks and crevices, let the light bounce off the surfaces and play with our imagination, lit the way up. The tour culminated in a grand finale: a discovery 'room' with a balcony with the the most stunning formation of 'drapes'. A continuous arrangement of sheet-like stalactites, starting off wavy at the top ending sharp and straight when viewed from the side. They hung like curtains of some ancient alphabet engraved into the rock, curling into intricate designs and patterns.
A truly magnificent display of what nature had quietly designed while we went about our business in the hub of civilization. There was stunned silence as we marched out of the caves and back into a shock of sunlight, and onto the bus. Truly marvelous, and utterly awe-inspiring.
The short trek up from the lake, where the boat ride had ended back up to the main recreational area was sufficient to tire us, especially with the sun beating down fiercely. What was supposed to be a short break turned into an extended halt, with some taking naps, a few going nearly delirious over a delicious trail mix made all the more so with molten chocolate, and a few others restless to get a short hike out of the way. Eventually, the heat just got the better of us and we decided to drive instead towards Mt. Shasta, secretly harboring hopes of catching the fireworks somewhere along the way back.
An hour into the drive and the sun had mellowed considerably, and bright flowers dotting the way inspired us to pull up at the earliest suggestion of a trail head and get on our feet. The trail we chose was a short one, with only a modest gain in elevation but gave us glimpses of the beautiful Mt. Shasta off in the distance. The snow- capped peak would play hide and seek with us, sometimes hidden by a cloud, sometimes smothered by smoke, at others glistening white and glorious.
The hike back down was spent debating whether or not Qabuli channa would be made for dinner. Quite hilarious in retrospect, considering we were all utterly exhausted and happy to chew on anything edible, that we ended up eating Maggi. (Yes, much to the disappointment of the food crew, who'd planned a semi-barbecue over camp fire.)The food, plentiful and almost excessive as it was, was only incidental, as yet another bright new day awaited us, to be begun at the crack of dawn.
We had picked a tidy little spot, off the road on a slight incline, with a lake-view close by. So, in the morning, just before we left the campgrounds for our next destination we took off on an ever-so-mini 'hike'. From where we were parked, at a short walk down the road where it bent further into the camping area, was a grove of Manzanita trees and some wild bushes. Walking down through the mesh, we could see a clearing, offering a view of the lake. The last look at the lake was indeed more remarkable than my first one had been. The muddy shore was lined with trees, some lying prostrate with jagged branches, jutting out over the waters. A stark scene it was, with a raw appeal nonetheless.
A beautiful stop by all means.
Onward ho!

"How wonderful it is that nobody need wait a single moment before starting to improve the world." - Anne Frank

how true, how very true...

The Giving Club

A chance conversation one morning, many months ago at the bus stop, introduced me to one of my neighbors who commutes to work- a very earnest, curious and magnanimous spirit. This morning chat soon became a staple for me; my dose of enthusiasm for the day, my cup of purpose refilled. We would discuss everything from the addiction that living in the Bay Area is, to Broadway musicals, public health and epidemiology to Farmer's Markets. In one such conversation, E told me he was spending his evenings co-authoring a book! I was intrigued.
He went on to tell me all about the project. He and his friends had started a club they call the Giving Club. Its mission- to put together a book that could serve as a one-stop shop for anybody interested in donating their time or resources to charitable causes but clueless as to how to go about it or whom to approach; the causes range from care-giving at hospitals, environmental protection, education, empowerment of low-income illiterate communities, and many more such.
The idea behind it is at once a simple and noble one. There are many many issues plaguing the world today and the inequities glaring. Deep down, we all want to do something to help remove those inequities and lend a helping hand to someone in need. But which cause to support? What action to take? Is there an organization out there that could use our specific skills or talents? Is there a group out there looking for a voice to carry their message outward? Yes, many of us are indeed a little lost and caught in this web of ignorance. How nice it would be to have a neat little road-map telling us where to head to help illiterate tenants file a petition against exorbitant rents in a supposedly low-income housing tenement. How wonderful it would be to know the 5 organizations in the Bay Area working with poor children in middle school to provide after-school tutoring.
That is exactly what their club set out to do. The members represent a diversity of interests, educational and professional qualifications and affiliations to organizations. So, each member took on the responsibility of compiling a list of programs and organizations, sorted geographically and demographically, for a given area requiring our collective attention. They would meet every two weeks to brainstorm about meaningful causes that they have missed, identify outfits for financial givings that people like you and me can work with to reach out to the needy, and ways to enrich the book to be with their personal insights.
What I found most inspiring beyond the club and the tool that will result from it, was the thought behind it. Beyond engaging in service oneself, to find the means to enable others to serve. Oh! What a supreme act of generosity! What a marvelous idea and what a wonderful fraternity!
The Giving Club. Are you a member yet?